LASIK to Apocalypse-Proof Your Vision

In a post-apocalyptic world, when only the fittest will survive and competition for resources is fierce, you don’t want to wear a visible sign of weakness on your face. No matter how stylish your frames are, that’s exactly how other survivors will see your glasses after the SHTF.

Silicon Valley’s tech millionaires and billionaires are investing in LASIK surgery that will position them to be as successful in a post-apocalyptic world as they have been in this one. The list of the ultra-wealthy who have undergone this procedure includes Steve Huffman, CEO of Reddit, and Yishan Wong, former CEO of Reddit and Facebook employee.

Regarding his glasses, Huffman told The New Yorker, “Without them, I’m f*@#ed.”

LinkedIn co-founder Reid Hoffman told The New Yorker that by his estimate roughly half of Silicon Valley has what he describes as “apocalypse insurance” in place, and improved vision is a critical part of making sure you aren’t set up to not survive right out of the gate.

You don’t have to be a billionaire to get LASIK surgery. This outpatient procedure is surprisingly comfortable and affordable, with little downtime or recovery.

When making a case for Lasik eye surgery for survivalists, the evidence is clearly on surgery’s side.

Exhibit A: Piggy

In William H. Goulding’s classic work Lord of the Flies, Piggy’s glasses were seen a sign of weakness. Even if you haven’t read the book or seen the movie version, I’m sure you can figure out for yourself that Piggy doesn’t fare well in the end. Don’t be like Piggy. End up on top by making sure you look like the threat you are. It’s easy for an enemy to smash your glasses and render you defenseless—or at least weaken you—and they know it.

Speaking of smashed glasses, now is a good time to introduce you to…

Exhibit B: Henry Bemis

Any fan of The Twilight Zone is familiar with Bemis’s predicament. Bemis is a misanthrope who prefers books over people. When the world ends and he is the lone survivor, he finds himself in the ideal situation of finally being alone with his books. UNTIL HIS ONLY GLASSES BREAK. Without his glasses, Bemis’s life is meaningless to him, and he hadn’t even gotten to the part yet where he was starving to death.

How Lasik Works

LASIK surgery uses laser technology to quickly and painlessly reshape the patient’s cornea, which corrects their vision. The risk of side-effects is low, and most people are able to go about their business as usual by the next day. With so little risk and such tremendous benefits, it’s easy to see why the ultra-wealthy are throwing their glasses away for good.

The Benefits of LASIK Surgery

    • Potential for maximum life expectancy – your chances of survival increase exponentially when you have good vision.
    • It’s cost-effective and convenient – no more glasses or optometrist appointments.


Learn more about the side-effects of laser surgery.


Watch a laser eye surgery, if you dare.

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